Trek Pepper

Doctor Pepper

Dalek I Love You

Quite like the new Salvador Dalik.....



Not so sure about the scottish dalek, might be pushing it somewhat


the openly gay daleks on the other hand are beautifully understated

An Historic Day

Mucus Plug here. Just found this stunning document while pottering aroundabout in my inextensive archives of extensive archives. The majestic Meryl Streep and fluffy bunny bundle of fun Philip Seymour Hoffman relaxing together during the filming of the feature film that they made, Doubt, on the very day he openly suggested she open a museum to house her extensive spork collection.
An historic day indeed, I'm sure you will disagree.

More dream grabs but what do they mean...

Mucus Plug here. I've been having more vivid dreams recently and while they all seemingly seem unrelated but then again and then not again they seem related in an unrelated sort of way, though may hap more unrelated in a related sort of thingybob doodle domp. I have swiftly and with little thought done some smashing dream grabs using my dream grabber device of some note but little consequence that that scoundrel Applehead Bilko stupidly lost to me in a stout hand or thrice of canasta during the celebrations last Tweeklemas Eve to see if anyone or anything or maybe your beloved pets can see a relationship or an unrelationship betwixt and betweenage delinquent and betty whiteteness to them because, to be both frank and candid as only a frankly candid person of my eminent sitting can be I myself see none whatsoeverandeveramen.


Is this supposed to mean something?




What is going on here?

A Public Service Announcement

The Rainn Wilson Dream

Mucus Plug here. So I have this recurring dream, and in this dream the majestic Rainn Wilson is a centaur galloping like a wild and untamed spirit beast boy horse across the vast plains inside an unusual toasted sandwich maker that only exists cos I say it does. A sky ghost of Leonard Nimoy and a half dalek version of Grace Kelly are taking photographs of this magnificent sight while the angel of Albert Einstein utterly fails to steal the limelight from Wilson by showing off a puppet he has made of Shirley Fenney from Laverne and Shirley.
I take comfort from the fact that I am obviously not the only person having such a dream as this.

The Pop Underground

THOUGHT DIAL

What do we want? THOUGHT DIAL
When do we want it?
That's besides the point. It's not when we want THOUGHT DIAL that matters, it's when THOUGHT DIAL wants you. THOUGHT DIAL.
This has been a public service announcement on behalf of THOUGHT DIAL. Have a safe and happy crimbo.

Seventh Annual Cute Convention, Chingford 1923

Mucus Plug, fountain of all knowledge and even more ignorance here. You may or may not recall
Terry Tickle,the fine and talentless dog who joined me on my recently recent journey of discovery, recovery and cover me (but don't make it too close to the original because that would be pointless), across the fair to middling United Staples of Americans which I recently recently undertook by the very undertaking of. Until unfairly recently, more recently than the recently recent journey I mentioned just moments ago (unless you stopped reading after the second sentence and went off to make a hot beverage and toast before resuming your reading, I which case I amend my estimation of my mention to twelve minutes ago) I half heartedly believed that my journey with Terry was not in anyway except anyway directly related to the subject of finding sticks in any directly related way or indeed anyway. In connection with a deep and meaningless conversation Terry and myself included had one memorably instantly forgettable night while staying at the home of a close friend, orthodontist and failed inventor of the electric spork, Camantha Cookiejar, on the subject of sticks of the found kind, when Terry arrived home from our reckless sojourn he dug out the above photograph for all our delight and edification that knows no bounds. What, in the name of Bruce Willis' Beloved Teenage Bong has the Seventh Annual Cute Convention, Chingford 1923 got to undo with found sticks? I hear you asking yourselves and I raise a weary eyebrow at the stupid stupidity of you asking yourself such a question which you obviously do not yet know the answer to as yet and if you carry on doing such a stupidly stupid thing I will make it my sole purpose and ambition to make sure you never get permission to enter a windmill anywhere in the world, so think on, I make this threat lightly and without considering the implied great effort involved so it is a hollow threat but neverthemoreorless it is one not to be taken seriously but to be taken seriously. Is that unclear, I hope so for all our sakes, snakes and chocolate milkshakes sakes. Anways with that surprisingly pleasant unpleasantness, if not behind us then at least pushed to one side or another it is time to switch on the enlightenment bulb in your brains as to the relevance of the above photographic item. Front row dead centre sits Professor Venessa Tiddletums and next to that esteemed and thrice beloved intellectual giant of a kitten sits Trevor Tickle great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather of Terry and he, you will only now notice I've no doubt except doubt itself, is holding the very first documented found stick ever to be documented. So indeed we are behelding here a true piece of stick finding history and herstory and all ourstory.
What young Terry did not realise is the darker implication I just made up totally spuriously and off the cuff when my eyes first fell upon this rare photograph. Evertheless I will now share a stark naked warning with you and it is simply this stark naked warning that has now realised it is stark naked and is now feeling slightly embarrassed at it unclothed state.
The Cute Walk Among Us And They Secretly Rule The World. There I've said it.
All the best to you and may all your windmill entering be unimpeded, well by myself at least.

Professor Mucus Plug's Holiday Snapshots

Hello Harrison Corduroy Jones, man of inaction, misadventurer, etc etc, here. While we await someone, or something, to send in a picture of a found stick I considered it inprudent to share with you some snapshots Mucus Plug just sent me of the lowlights of his recent journey journey of self discoverme around the United State You Are In Well Really I Ask You and do you realise the time? of the Americans. Make of them what you may, june, july and august presence.

Mucus masquerading as a pilot so he can get his hands on a free pair of cheap plastic headphones and sleeping mask.

In Denver, The Suburban Housewives of the Apocalypse plan their next move.

Not quite sure what is going on here, but it all looks innocent enough.

Ziggy Stardust caught on the way to pick up a pint of milk and his morning newspaper while riding his aquatic bike.

An Emergency of some small Urgency Message from Professor Mucus Plug

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Mucus Plug here. You may or may not or maybe or mayhaps recall I am the world's leading authority. I have been decidedly distracted these last four hectors of harvest moon time, involving my brain stuff in unsubstantiated but detailed research on the vexed question of is there any real connection between the noise a competitively priced electric kettle makes when thrown derisively against the side door of a newly painted windmill and the stone cold fact that dolphins, for all their supposed intelligence, really cannot tell the difference between a well thumbed (and slightly overdue) library book copy of The History Of The Glockenspiel And Its Use In The Theatre Of War (Specifically Pertaining To The On Going War Between The Man and Mother Nature) and an abandoned wheelbarrow full of unwanted grandfather clock parts that have been marinated in larks spit for 14 days or so and then promptly forgotten about.
Much to my astonishment and the unastonishment of others less prone to astonishment than I, I found no connection (or at least no connection I care to share with the the outside world, nor the inside world for that matter) and in a fit of childish, some might say, not so childish perturbations, I bought myself a large vintage chopper style motorbicycle, a tassle sleeved swede jacket, some wrap around shades (like Elvis wore when he went to the seaside) and a third rate cowboy hat and set off on an event free journey across the United States of Americans in a vague and slightly muddled attempt to find myself (man). Accompanying me on my dull quest for enlightenment was Terry Tickle Tums the cat actor who portrayed Mr. Data's cat Spot in the Star Trek motion picture Generations. Terry had, by pure and simple chance also come to a crossroads in his life after the proposed sequel to that film titled The Search For Spot failed to materialise when someone pointed out that Data had already found his missing cat in the thrilling final sequence of the previous film. His owner Mrs. Wanda Lusp upset by this disappointless development had consequently lost confidence in her own career of delivery babies (she was going through a midwife crisis) and the downbeat atmosphere about the home had become difficult. So rather than stick around Terry had also got himself a large vintage chopper style motorbicycle and together we set out on our self seeking sojourn. Getting our large vintage chopper style motor bicycles on and off the greyhound buses we had decided upon as our means of transportation for our journey proved to be somewhat awkward and cumbersome at first but we persevered and by the time we arrived in Maryland we had the process down to twenty minutes getting on and thirteen minutes getting off..a vast improvement on the previous nine attempts. It was clear to us though that we had not thought our mode of transportation through because both Terry and myself found that we suffered from slight but noticeable travel sickness by using greyhound buses. I will not thrill you here and now with the many non events and unamusing half anecdotes and hit and misadventures that we failed to experience along the way but ask you instead to wait for the minor motion picture currently being made of all this, Queasy Riders, starring Bradley Pitt as myself and Jennifer Aniston as the voice of Terry, (that's unless that silly Angelina Jollie finds out and puts a stop to it).

Anyway upon my return to the place I return to, I have discovered that something is, to put it bluntly, amiss over at The Found A Stick Foundry (home of Found A Stick). My messenger pigeons are returning unanswered, and as you can see yourself it has been over a year since the last post (no not the trumpet thing). With a sense (if not the meaning) of trepidation I then hacked into their steam powered mainframe motherboard thingy to try and discover, uncover and recover what has been occurring in my long absence (makes the heart grow (peter) fonda). And therein I found a strange mystery wrapped in a dark fluffy enigma and placed in a shiny, almost new, H.R. Puffenstuff lunch box that worried me so greatly that later that night I forget to put any sugar in my bedtime cup of cocoa and had to come all the way back downstairs in consequence. It was obvious to me then that something needed to be done and done then and there, when it had become obvious to me that something needed to be done. And the obviousness of then and there of this done thing was to me quite obvious.

So that very Wednesday straight after watching "my shows" on TV I embroidered an urgent handkerchief with a request for an extra special meeting of the other great minds of our age to be held in the Great Hall of Mentholitus in Hendonia over at Art Into Dust and sent the finished item to the High Priests of Imperfect Punctuations and Backwater Ponderousness at the Church of the Buddha Kittens. They looked over my findings, then sifted through them with a fine tooth comb then gave the fine tooth comb to a passing raven to feather its nest with and insteadfast fashion, placed my findings in a liquidiser and turned them into fillings for various pies, pastries and tartlets which once consumed enabled they to fully concur that my request was a valid and scrumptious one and so a meeting was set up to debate the best course of action to be taken and the best course of inaction not to be taken. I put on my best bib and tucker and pogo danced through the mosh pit of my mind straight over there as quickly as slang sometimes falls out of common daily usage. Though I will admit stopping off at the Holloway Road branch of Percy Ingles on the way for a cup of tea and an apple turnover on the way. And what a grand piano of a meeting it was. Anybody who was everybody was in attendance that day: The Buddha Kitten Number 9, Bing the Merciless, Mirror Universe Spock, Wyngarde as Number Two, Dr. Zachary Smith, 1971 Period Frank Zappa, the Too Many Peter Cooks (who nearly spoilt the whole thing) and the Reluctant But Beautiful Angel were all there. It was quite a sight I can tell you. Except I do not need to tell you because I took a photographic plate so you can judge the quiteness of the sight for yourselves.



There followed an apparentness that was quick, in that it quickly became apparent that someone should be sent to investigate this dramatic situation further and since my own dramatic license had expired a few weeks previously it was decided that we should call on the services of my old friend and all round daring do adventurer Harrrison Corduroy Jones in this matter. You may know him from such adventures as The Raindeers Often Lost In The Park,in which he had to save his girlfriend and melt a lot of very naughty nazis and get hold of the Ark of the David Coverdale so it could be put into a large ominous government warehouse. Or maybe from The Shirley Temple Of Doom, (a very talented but quite evil little girl) in which he had to eat monkey brains with a spoon and stop some very naughty Indians from contravening quite a few child labour laws while saving his girlfriend. Or how's about The Last Condiment (In which his father was played by Roger Moore) in which he had to stop some very naughty nazis from getting hold of Baby Jesus' cup (different naughty nazis, mind, there was a lot of them about at the time) while saving his latest girlfriend. Or perhaps The Kiss-And-Tell Skull in which he got locked in a refrigerator, met an old girlfriend and learnt the consequences of unprotected sexual congress and stopped some very naughty Russians gossiping about aliens and flying saucers and the like.

Anyway even if you do not know Harrison from the above , trust me when I tell you that when you need a crisis turned into a drama then he is the get go guy to go to if you need to go to a get go guy. So the very next day Harrison got into an aeroplane that took off from a real looking private airfield but then for some reason flew over a large old fashioned looking map with a dotted black line in front and behind the moving craft to indicate the route being taken and then ten seconds later it landed at another real looking airfield. From there he made his way to the Found A Stick Foundation and later that day he sent me the following rather dramatic report.
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"When I arrived at the same time as arriving, the Foundry was blackcurrent dark and quietly quiet in the quietest sort of quieticity; the shadowy halls blacker even than Rod Stewart's black, black heart. It was completely deserted and by that I do not mean that it had somehow been transformed into a pudding, that is a different type of desert all together so do not trifle with me here. I mean by what I meant when meaning it, that there was not a living soul anywhere within its dark foreboding walls (why they had chosen to go with a dark foreboding colour scheme for the walls is a puzzlement to me, if they had gone with a brilliant white then it would just bring so much light to the rooms and open out the spaces....) It was obvious someone or something or somewhere over the rainbow, did not want me here. There were cleverly designed traps everywhere that, using just my casual cunning, my quiet love of cufflinks and sharpened senses, I had to avoid at all cost. Traps like a door that looked liked you could push to open when in fact you had to pull that made you feel slightly foolish for a moment, a desk that jutted out a couple of inches too far so you banged your leg on it as you passed and an unexpected step that made you go whoa when you misjudged it and stumble slightly before regaining your balance. Once I had got passed these potentially slightly inconvenient traps and made my way to the computer room I found that the information contained within and on the machines went no further than the last post on the blog. I was baffled, flummoxed, consternated, unbedazzled, bamboozled, phazed and a bit bemused. I lent backward, (in a backward leaning sort of way) and put a hand down, (in a hand putting down sort of way) on the desk behind me and fickle fuzzy fraught fear pricked in my ears at the sound of a faint, but unmistakably faint crackling. I slowly slowly catchee monkey turned my head and looked down with trepidation in my pockets and there much to my horror, only mere inches from my tremblingly trembling fingertips sat an open bag of Hasbro jelly snake sweets. God I HATE Snakes!! I jumped back (in a backward jumping sort of way) in unsurprisingly surprised surprise and in doing so knocked over a small trash can from which rolled a screwed up ball of paper. I bent down and picked it up, fumbled it slightly and dropped it, then picked it up again but didn't quite get it right and it slipped through my fingers and back to the floor, so picked it up again, banged my elbow on the side of the desk which jarred it from my grasp and sent it tumbling to the floor once more and finally I really concentrated and picked it up without any mishappian incidents involved then opened it out and put it down on the desk to flatten it out.Then I quickly realised that putting it down on the desk to flatten it out was not sufficiant in itself so used my hands to flatten the note out instead.   It was it appeared the rough notes for the very next post to appear on the blog and it explained everything except for the things that it did not explain but I would have to piece together in the next scene.

It seems a woman named Melissa Applewine had recently sent them half of a strange man made stick she had found, after an extensive and fairly detailed shopping trip, outside her front gate. She had enquired it they might know what this half of a strange man made stick might be and one of the possible answers they had given in reply was that it might be a magic wand. This latest update from her said that she had been so excited at the possibility that it might be a magic wand which she could then use to conjure up as many clothes as she could possibly dream of that she had spent a few hours outside her front gate searching for the other missing half and when she found it, she had taped the two halves together and sent them a photograph of it to get their opinion now it was complete. The reply she received was laced with ridicule and cynical disbelief. Firstly it was pointed out that there is no such thing as a real magic wand and she was a silly goose to think otherwise and secondly it was also pointed out that now they could see the whole stick in was totally obvious that the stick she had found was nothing more than a discarded chopstick. and they were correct, the photo was indeed that of a chopstick. But then I looked closer and thirty nine percent of the hairs on the back off my neck rose while the other six one percent possibly did not...it was hard to judge at that moment or indeed misjudge. Surfice to say this neck hair rising was enough to add the required dramatic tension to this tale though possibly it would have been better served if I had not mentioned the percentage involved.
This was no ordinary chopstick, but the legendary chopstick of the ancient and often unwise wizard Klee Shay, lost for a thousand years and then found for a couple of weeks and then lost again for another thirty seven minutes and then found again for five months before being lost again for another fifty nine years. A chopstick imbued with great magical powers or so it was whispered in far away places and libraries and it was now in the poccession of this unwitting girl instead of someone sensible like Penelope Keith or Kenneth Kendal. Luckily her address was in the data base so I raced from the building in fear fuelled haste, but then had to wait twenty minutes for the bus to the station and when I got there the trains were not running and I had to wait another thirty minutes for the bus replacement service to turn up and then it just sat there for another fifteen minutes while the driver read a newspaper and once I was on board it was another fifteen minutes until it left and then it when all round the houses and we had to change to another bus that eventually took us to another station where the trains were running from and I had to wait 35 minutes for the train to turn up and then that sat in the platform for ten minutes because they were running a reduced shuttle service and there was no buffet car and I was quite hungry by this time and I had to sit next to this old lady who insisted on telling me all about her lumbago and her friend Bunty's painful corns like three or four times in tedious detail while I pretended to be interested. But eventually we arrived at our destination of Northampton and then I had to wait another twenty minutes for the bus at that end and that went all round the houses until finally dropping me a good half hour walk from her house.

Melissa was quite surprised to see me and wary at first until I had explained the reason for my visit, then she smiled sadly and let me in. Her home was sunk to the nuts deep in clothes, heaving piles and piles of them everywhere and in what had once been her sitting room sat a veritable mountain of designer shoes and handbags. But there was no joy in her joyless eyes as she joylessly surveyed all her possessions. We sat in the kitchen and over a welcomingly welcome cup of tea and some unfortunately nondiscript cake I told her what I had witnessed at the Foundry that had been witnessed by me in the witnessing of and she blanched like a cameleon stood next to something extreemly blanchy and said she had not realised what had happened and that she had thought her spell was for just removing that slightly humiliating reply they had put up. She brought out the stick from the place she brought the stick out from and handed it to me saying that she would be glad to be rid of it because even though she loved all her clothes and shoes and bags and accessorising stuff she had realised she in fact loved shopping even more than all these things and the stick had taken all the fun out of it. I looked down at the seemingly innocuous stick resting in my hands and knowing the legendary mystical powers of the chopstick as I did, it did not take me long to realise what had happenen, then become distracted thinking about which of the Grange Hill Annuals was my favourite but then just as quickly lickerdee spit I returned to the matter at hand. Instead of just removing the post as she had hoped, the magic instead had wound back time within the Foundry to the moment before the the post had been started and then frozen them all in that moment. The staff  were lost in the time between the ticks of the clock, trapped on a Tuesday from last year. Melissa asked me if I could use the chopstick to reverse the spell but remembering all the melty faces, crumbling to dust, burst into flames special effects stuff that usually happens at this point in the plot, I just smiled and wrapped the stick in the embroidered handkerchief you had given me and laid it down on the table. And then because there is always a love interest involved she sunk into my arms with a sigh and I bent my head down and softly kissed her upturned lips and the view panned up to the window, the curtains fluttering in the breeze....and fade.

I departed for London the next day with the chopstick held firmly in my hand, there was a waiting box in a large ominous government warehouse for it of that I was pretty, no more than that, beautifully certain. Would you believe it on the journey I ended up sitting next to that old lady again politely nodding while she told me all about her lumbago and her friend Bunty's painful corns. But then unexpectedly she stopped her speaking stuff right instantly and spying the wrapped up stick in my hand she reach out and before I could stop her in a stopping her sort of way she took it from my hand in a taking sort of way, unwrapped it in a unwrapping sort of way and held it up with a smile on her grey old face. "This is no ordinary chopstick is it?" she said her soft eyes glinting like a bag of ready salted crisps accidently dropped outside a lighthouse. "But the legendary chopstick of the wise and ancient wizard Klee Shay, lost for a thousand years, and then found for a couple of weeks and then lost again for another thirty seven minutes and then found again for five months before being lost again for another fifty nine years, if my memory serves. It is a thing of great and terrible power..." and then she rewrapped it and handed it back to me saying. "Oh this is my stop, so I will have to say goodbye young man." Then she stood up and walked down the carriage before turning around as she got to the door and saying. "To break the spell all that needs to happen is for somebody to send in a photo of a found stick. It is as simple as that." And then she was gone and I was left to ponder not only as to who she really was but why yet again was there no buffet car on this train."

So there you have it my friends my friend's friends and my friend's friends, mystery solved. Now will someone out there please send a photo in of a found stick.

A correction to a mistaken mistake we unmistakenly mistook

We never ever make mistakes here at the Stick Foundation located at the Stick Foundry home of Found A Stick but we do sometimes make mistakes. We are deeply honoured and not a great deal amazed to have received a correspondence on the subject of a mistake we mistakenly mistook recently from none other than the legend in his own lunchtime, Professor Mucus Plug who, we are sure, you all have knowledge in the knowing of as, is the world’s leading authority. Some others with even more knowing stuff inside their heads might also recognise him as the award losing author of the worst selling reference books Urbane Myths for the Condescending Gentleman, volumes 1 to 73. Professor Plug has found a mistake we mistakenly mistook on the Stick 32 post and has kindly dropped us a line not only to point out the error of our erroneous ways but, as is his generously gracious and graciously generous habit, to offer the correct correction of the mistake we have so unmistakably mistook and in doing so taking it away from the dark place of wrongness and delivered it up into the shiny bright land of rightness in the wink of an eye.
Professor Plug is, as we have already noted a few lines above this line, the world’s leading authority so we bow to his spectacular knowledge in everything ever and then some (except for the mating rituals of Aardvarks of which he has often and repeatedly and consistently and insistently insisted that he has absolutely no interest in, in the slightest). Over to you Professor Plug.

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A rare photograph of Professor Mucus Plug seen here working from home
Dear sirs.
While going about my daily business of monitoring everything important, and then some, I could not help but notice a small but big mistake in your recent posting posted upon this place that you post things. Specifically this mistake of which I speak of here in and forthwith is within your post titled Stick 32 in which you do opinion that the name of the young bespectacled wizard you have mistaken called Dennis Potter is named Dennis Potter but in fact and to my extensive knowledge which is extensive, the name of the young bespectacled wizard actually is instead Harold Potter, he being the central character in a series of children’s books by the author JFK Rowling. JFK Rowling is for reasons totally unconnected with the finding of sticks, a fascinating woman and after extensive research on my part, with plenty of referencing, cross referencing and really cross referencing, I can impart the following cold stone facts about the fascinating woman whose name is JFK Rowling and those stone cold facts are as follows:
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JFK Rowling literally shot to fame starring as herself in the 1985 Kevin Costner film JFK about her early life working in a Dallas book depository warehouse near a grassy knoll directed by her then husband Oliver Rowling Stone. (Mr. Costner won the Best Use Of An Overhead Projector In A Film Oscar for his part in this motion picture before turning his back on acting to become a choreographer and opening a dance school for wild animals out west somewhere). Meanwhile JFK was so inspired by her own story as portrayed by herself in this film that she decided then and then to become a famous author of children’s books under the nom de plume Beatrix Potter. Her books Peter Rabbit And The Philosopher’s Carrot and Peter Rabbit And The Chamber Of Carrots became immediate moderate sellers. This period of her life was also portrayed in motion picture form but this time as three films starring Renée Zellweger and Keanu Reeves. The Beatrix Trilogy (The Beatrix, The Beatrix Reloaded and The Beatrix Revolutions) were box office smashes and yet JFK was so uninspired by her own story as portrayed in these three films (and also displeased with Zellweger's performance of herself) that she decided then and then to drop the Beatrix Potter name and start again this time writing children’s books under her real name of JFK Rowling. (Though she gives a sly nod to her former nom de plume by using the name Potter for her new central character.) Which brings us neatly back to the Harold Potter books which have become so successful that in one day alone they sold more copies in the Milton Keynes branch of Asda than there are giraffes on the planet (and there are a lot of giraffes on the planet). The books have also been made into films starring the Olympic marathon runner Paula Radcliffe as Harold Potter and jazz saxophonist Robbie Coltrane as Miss.Tiggy-Winkle. Having finished writing the Harold Potter books JFK is currently at a bit of a loose end but I am confident that this fascinating (for reasons totally unconnected with finding sticks) woman will soon enough involve herself in something that is not writing Harold Potter Books and so long as it is not something to do with the mating rituals of aardvarks (which I wish to go on record here and categorically state I personally have absolutely no interest in at all) I will turn a vaguely interested eye to I have no doubt.
All the best
Mucus Plug
P.S. I keep meaning to find a stick for you but have been horrendously busy of late working on my definitive history of usherettes, but I will get round to finding a stick for you soon I am sure. Keep up the good work.
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Well thank you Professor for taking time out from your busy horrendousness to send in your world's leading authoritative account of the life of JFK Rowling in connection to our original mistake we mistaken mistook in our before now posting. She is indeed a fascinating woman even though this fascinating is totally unconnected with the stick finding purposes of this blog, it was an honour and joy for us to be enlightened by enlightenment by the world's leading authority.

Stick 35

Dave Smith of Durham England has found a pretty straight forward stick. Where did you find your pretty straight forward stick Dave?

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On the grass in my front garden

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Well that was pretty straight forward Dave, thanks for sharing your pretty straight forward stick with us.

Stick 34 Merry Christickmas

Another first for the Stick Foundation here at the Stick Foundry, home of Found A Stick, that first being our first post of a found stick from overoceans.

Rachel Strules is a United States of American and she resides in the United States of America in the beautiful state of Vermont which is one of the states in the United States of America. The stick that Rachel has found is a very eloquent straight thin stick with slight playful upturns at both ends and a waif like appendage a third of the way down (though possibly two thirds of the way up depending on your individual perception). So tell us please Rachel do, just where found your very eloquent straight thin stick with slight playful upturns at both ends and a waif like appendage a third of the way down (though possibly two thirds of the way up depending on your individual perception).

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I found this stick while shovelling my driveway in Winooski , Vermont . It was the first snowfall of the season and I was happy to be outside. I thought it was very usual to find a stick in my driveway because there are no trees near by.

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So you were outside shovelling your driveway at the time you found your very eloquent straight thin stick with slight playful upturns at both ends and a waif like appendage a third of the way down (though possibly two thirds of the way up depending on your individual perception)? We can only assume that your driveway must consist of loose gravel or some such shovellable substance because we are of the opinion here at Found A Stick that shovelling a driveway made out of tarmac or some such unshovellable substance would be a strange and seemingly impossible task to have set yourself especially since you had the added complication of a layer of snowfall (the first of the season) on top of the driveway you were shovelling to contend with.

It has also now occurred to us here at Found A Stick that maybe when you said that you were shovelling your driveway what you were actually inferring was that you were in fact shovelling the snow that resulted from the already mentioned snowfall (the first of the season) from your driveway and not as we first assumed the actual driveway itself. If this is indeed the case then the fact that your driveway may well be made out of tarmac or some such unshovellable substance, the shovelling of which while remaining in our opinion a strange and seemingly impossible task to have set yourself, is now totally and relevantly irrelevant to the subject at hand, (well irrelevant to us but maybe not to Rachel because we can conceptualise that it would be in fact easier to shovel snow from a driveway made out of tarmac or some such unshovellable substance as opposed to attempting to shovel snow from a driveway consisting of loose gravel or some such shovellable substance which could easily lead to all sorts of unwanted snow/gravel shovelling complications which is the last thing you need when your are happy to be outside because of the first snowfall of the season.

Whatever is the true facts of the truth here we have to applaud Rachel's sheer tenacity and commitment to her driveway clearing activity because frankly we have tired ourselves out just talking about it.

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As to you thinking it "very usual to find in a stick in my driveway because there are no trees near by" rather than finding it "very unusual to find a stick in my driveway because there are no trees near by" shows clearly that you already understand the magic of found sticks in ways that clearly show that you already understand the magic of found sticks when so many simply don't. You found a stick in your driveway but even though there are no trees near by you consider your find usual rather than unusual because you instinctively it seems know that found sticks move in mysterious ways, a wonder to behold. A wonderful intuitive insight on your part and not at all a simple typo as the more closed hearted might believe. Thank you Rachel for sharing your very eloquent straight thin stick with slight playful upturns at both ends and a waif like appendage a third of the way down (though possibly two thirds of the way up depending on your individual perception) and for your wonderfully intuitive insight into the nature of found sticks.

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Update: One of our more eagle eyed observers from the Stick Foundation here at the Stick Foundry, home of Found A Stick, has noticed the white flakey stuff upon which Rachel's very eloquent straight thin stick with slight playful upturns at both ends and a waif like appendage a third of the way down (though possibly two thirds of the way up depending on your individual perception) is caught in repose upon in her picture and has ventured the opinion that this white flakey stuff upon which Rachel's very eloquent straight thin stick with slight playful upturns at both ends and a waif like appendage a third of the way down (though possibly two thirds of the way up depending on your individual perception) is caught in repose upon in her picture is in fact snow. This ventured opinion that was ventured as an opinion by one of our more eagle eyed observers was nearly dismissed as fanciful nonsense at first until it was also pointed out that Rachel herself mentions a first snowfall of the season in her explanation and this also pointed out thing was enough to convince us all that this was indeed snow upon which Rachel's very eloquent straight thin stick with slight playful upturns at both ends and a waif like appendage a third of the way down (though possibly two thirds of the way up depending on your individual perception) is caught in repose upon in her picture. And though normally we would refrain from surfing the Yuletide here at Found A Stick, the festive touch it brings to the picture puts us into the spirit that is associated with this time of the year and makes us declare this stick our official Christmas found stick of this Christmas. So thank you Rachel for being our Secret Stick Santa.

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And as for our eagle eyed observer who made all this festive fun possible with his eagle eyed observations, well as a reward we are booking him into hospital straight away to have his eagle eyes replaced with human eyes as it has always been his long hoped for wish to no longer go through life as a eagle eyed freak. A heart warming conclusion to this post we are sure you'll all agree. Merry Christickmas one and all.

Stick 33

Harry Gold of Hampstead Garden Suburbs England has found a robust yet playful stick to share with us here at Found A Stick. So tell us Harry where did you find this robust yet playful stick?

"Gmar chatimah tovah" to you all at Found A Stick. I was returning home recently on Zot Hanukkah, the last day of Hanukkah, from synagogue and looking forward to lighting all eight lights on the Menorah with the shamash before settling down to eat some fine sufganiyah while watching my children play with their dreidel, when I found this rather fine stick on the driveway to my neighbour Saul’s house. I have been keeping my eye out for a stick to share with you all at Found A Stick over this holiday period but so far much to my sorrow had come up empty handed. So it seemed especially fitting that I should finally find this fine stick on today of all days since Zot Hanukkah is particularly auspicious for the fulfillment of prayers.

Well Harry this robust yet playful stick you have found for us here at Found A Stick is your own little Hannukkah Miracle and we thank you for sharing it with us. Gmar chatimah tovah to you too.

We were thinking that some of the words you are using here are perhaps unknown to some of our readers, so because we always try to be thoughtful here at The Stick Foundry, home of Found A Stick we thought to thoughtfully put together a little glossary of these words for those readers to which these words are unknown.

Auspicious. Favoured by fortune; prosperous; fortunate.
Fulfilment: The act of consummating something (a desire or promise etc)
Particularly: In a particular manner; expressly; with a specific reference or interest; in particular; distinctly.
Especially: In an especial manner; chiefly; particularly; peculiarly; in an uncommon degree.

Stick 32

So we waited ages, here at the Stick Foundry home of Found A Stick, for our first stick fashioned by the hand of man and then wouldn’t you know it a second stick fashioned by the hand of man comes along in quick succession. Sticks fashioned by the hand of man are like buses, it seems here at Found A Stick. But only in the sense that buses are a convenient and generally reliable form of public transport and if sticks fashioned by the hand of man were also buses, then they too would be a convenient and generally reliable form of public transport. Anyway we digress so let’s get back to the matter in hand.
Melissa Applewine of Northampton, England has found a most intriguing stick that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick. So tell us Melissa where did you find a most intriguing stick that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick?
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I was in the local branch of H&M in the changing rooms upstairs trying on this beautiful red dress I had come across. I was shopping for an outfit to wear to my work’s upcoming Christmas party and was looking for something both stylish and suitably festive because I always like to wear something both stylish and suitably festive to the work’s Christmas party. But though the dress looked perfect on the hanger when I tried it on it did not hang well on the shoulders. A shame that because I really did like the dress. So I changed out of it and left the changing rooms and noticing that time was getting on I reluctantly gave up my search for something both stylish and festive to wear at my work’s upcoming Christmas party, for the day. (I’ll resume it on the weekend). So I then took the down escalator down to the ground floor and then departed the shop. Well not before being swept away by the greatest sparkly red and silver scarf in the accessory department. I mean surely it could go with whatever dress I do finally find for the upcoming work’s Christmas party, right? (And this triumphant find also means that I no longer had to go along with my self imposed limitation I had imposed on myself to find a red dress for my work’s upcoming Christmas party but could now broaden my search to other colours of dresses, confident that the sparkly red and silver scarf I had just purchased so fortuitously in the accessory department would bring the desired suitably festive touch I desired.) I then walked briskly down the high street until I reached my bus stop. After a ten minute wait my bus arrived so I boarded it and sat near the back, looking through my bags at some of my more successful purchases of the shopping trip to wile away the time on the twenty minute journey home, such as the really cool blue top with white embroidered patterns at the neck., the black jeans that fitted just right and the yellow skirt I was really pleased with at the time but looking at it again I was now not sure about, so I might take it back. Finally I arrived at my stop and I got off the bus that I had been travelling on and crossed the road at the lights. Then I walked down the street and turned left, walked down that road (picking up my pace a bit aware that it looked like it might start raining any minute which would ruin my blow-out) and at the end of that road I turned right into my street, walking down it towards my house. As I arrived at my front gate I happened to look down and immediately noticed with my eyes this rather intriguing stick.

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Hmm...so you found the stick outside your front gate? So why did you bother…oh, never mind. Please continue Melissa.

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I bent down and picked it up but did not look at the stick that I had found until I had put all my shopping away and made myself a nice cup of tea and sat down. When I did then look at the stick that I had found I have to admit I was quite mesmerised by it. It is, I estimate, nearly six inches in length and for most of that length of nearly six inches it possesses four flat sides of exquisite smoothness of such smooth exquisiteness that is so exquisitely smooth that the only thing I can think to compare it to would be to imagine, if you will, George Clooney as a babe in arms and how smooth his baby bottom would have been. Yes, that smooth. But then if this exquisite smoothness was not enough, though it is enough, towards one end the stick that I found tapers off and as it does this tapering I have just mentioned it becomes rounded like doweling is rounded before finishing at a flat smooth point. Meantime while all this tapering action is going on at that end at the other end it is strangely and unexpectedly ragged and splintery which is unexpected and strange because the rest of the stick is so precise. I find myself baffled and flummoxed as to what the original purpose of the stick I have found could possibly be but as I look at it again I do have the feeling that it is special and that it is anything but mundane. And though sharing the stick I have found with you at Found A Stick is an end in itself I cannot but secretly hope that you might enlighten me with enlightenment as to you opinions on what this stick that I have found could possibly be.
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Well, Melissa thank you for sharing this most intriguing stick with us here at The Stick Foundry, home of Found A Stick. Let us say straight away that bottom line what you have here is a found stick, it’s as simple and as effective as that. And we would also add that found sticks are never, ever mundane unless of course they are mundane and that every found stick is equally special except some are more special that others. Your most intriguing stick is certainly special and anything but mundane. Though generally we shy away from the question of what a found stick was before it was a found stick (because most of the time the answer is: a part of a tree) we cannot deny that you have found a most intriguing stick that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick. After this much conjecture we have come up with not one but two, some might venture to say, fanciful ideas of just what this most intriguing stick that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick might have formally been former to it being a found stick. But before we commence with our fanciful ideas of just what this most intriguing stick that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick might have formally been former to it being a found stick let us explain to you the ragged and splintery end mystery.

We find ourselves confidently stating that we believe that while your found stick is complete in itself as all found sticks are, originally it was a longer stick in length that has been broken possibly in half and that in fact you have only found the top half of the original stick. So with the ragged and splintery end mystery now we hope no longer a ragged and splintery end mystery we now will attempt to enlighten you with enlightenment as you secretly hoped we might do.

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Maybe this most intriguing stick, that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick was in fact the business end of a conductor’s baton vigorously snapped in half by a disgruntled maestro when the evening’s orchestral practice in a nearby concert hall (or some similar venue suitable for an orchestra to practice in, say a church hall or the local scouts hut perhaps) was not to his exacting standards. The broken baton was then discarded at some point post breakage to somehow later turn up outside your front gate due to a series of chance events that we will not go into here and now but might go into there and after now but probably wont.

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But then again could this most intriguing stick, that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick possibly be half of a magic wand, such as the one bespectacled teenage wizard Dennis Potter wields in such films as Dennis Potter And The Singing Detective and Dennis Potter And The Pennies From Heaven?

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Well fanciful as both these ideas might be we do know that while both maybe wrong it is self evident both cannot be right. We hope that the results of our conjecture are of some help and succour to you Melissa. Thank you for sharing the most intriguing stick you have found that has been the subject of much conjecture here at Found A Stick.

Stick 31

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Pamela Brandywine of Milton Keynes England has found a rather dramantic stick or maybe it is not a rather dramatic stick but photographed in a rather dramatic way, we cannot say. But then possibly it is a rather dramatic stick photographed in a rather dramatic way and then we have to consider if photographing a rather dramatic stick in a rather dramatic way might then make a rather dramatic stick appear even more rather dramatic than it already is when it is already a rather dramatic stick, again we cannot say. Whatever the finished result is a photograph of a found stick that is so rather dramatic that we fancy it could have been cast down from Olympus by the god Zeus after he had picked Ambrosia from his teeth with it. So Pamela where did you find a rather dramantic stick or maybe it is not a rather dramatic stick but photographed in a rather dramatic way, but then possibly it is a rather dramatic stick photographed in a rather dramatic way?


On the front step of what was once the ladies entrance to the Victorian public convienences on the high road which were shut down a good ten years ago now, next to the petshop which I had been frequenting in order to buy hay for my hamster Cyril only moments before my dramatic find.


Seems to us your mention of a "dramatic" find goes someway to clearing up our little mystery here and that we were undoubtedly mistaken to even consider that the stick you found was ever not a rather dramatic stick but only photographed in a rather dramatic way that made it look like a rather dramatic stick when it was not a rather dramatic stick. But it now seems that it was a rather dramatic stick anyway. But then this brings up once again the idea that since it is a rather dramatic stick photographed in a rather dramatic way, then we have to for a second time consider if photographing a rather dramatic stick in a rather dramatic way might then make a rather dramatic stick appear even more rather dramatic than it already is when it is already a rather dramatic stick.
And now a third option now occurs to us here at The Stick Foundry, home of Found A Stick. What if the photograph itself is not rather dramatic in the slightest but only appears so because the rather dramatic stick itself is even more rather dramatic than we first thought! That would make this a really rather dramatic stick find for which we thank you Pamela for sharing with us here at Found A Stick.

On occassions such as this we can often have the strong and sure belief that stick finding is nothing short of a mystery wrapped in an enigma, wrapped in cling film and stored away in the deepest spiritual and emotional levels of all our collective ids. But then on other occassions we think....nah that's a load of old tosh innit?

Stick 30

Colin Bunclark of Luton England has found a short but rather pleasing stick with a golden tint to it.
Tell us Colin if you will were did you find a short but rather pleasing stick with a golden tint to it.

Half way down the short footpath linking Elsden Road to Hoppington Crescent which serves as a short cut to the self service launderette next to the Spar minimarket on the high road.

Thank you Colin for sharing your fine photo of a short but rather pleasing stick with a golden tint to it and the brief guided tour around your local neighbourhood that now seems like a home away from home to us here at Found A Stick.

Stick 29

Jamie Mottram of Hastings England has found a stick and has brought up an uninteresting point he wishes clarification on. Well Jamie with such a robust stick share as this who are we not to clarify an uninteresting point for you as per your wish.

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I found this fine stick on the path leading to the cliff tops. I have noticed that while some of the featured found sticks here at Found A Stick have been photographed, I assume in the moment of blessed discovery, other of the featured found sticks here at Found A Stick have obviously been captured for stick finding posterity slightly further down the temporal stream post finding wise. I at first attempted to capture a visual image of the stick I had found in situ so to speak only to find, much to my understandable chagrin, that said found stick that I had found did not show up against the ground on which it lay. A moment of confounded perplexation hung above my head like a dark cloud of confounded perplexation but I then noticed a discarded and sodden periodical, possible a newspaper. (Though whether of local or national variety and with a daily, weekly or maybe fortnightly nature I cannot say because I did not investigate further in this matter. Is that frightfully amiss of me?) I moved the stick from it's cradle of discovery and placed it boldly where you see it boldly placed in my picture and this time...well you can see the results for yourselves I am confident of that. But it was only later when I was at home eating some fine hobnobs and drinking a mint chocolate Options beverage that doubts started to cross my mind of the legitimacy of my moving the stick in the way that I had. Recalling recent unforgetable found sticks such as Susan's stick with white circle painted beneath and Amelia's breathtaking triple stick on double yellow lines it suddenly occurred to me that my photograph of a found stick atop the sodden periodical, possibly a newspaper (the unknown providence of which has already discussed at some length by myself above so I will not waste words on that side issue once more at this very moment in time) could be a matter of some misunderstanding the likes of which I had no wanting to experience. I worried that my placing and further photographing of my found stick upon the sodden periodical , possibly a newspaper (for the unknown providence issues involved I direct you to my first interjection) may have been misconstrued as an attempt to garner some misplaced glory from both Susan's and Amelia's amazing stick finds along the lines of "oh, Susan found a stick with a white circle beneath and Amelia found found three sticks upon a double yellow line, well look here at my fine stick found a top atop a periodical, possibly a newspaper."(See first interjection for more details) This was never my intent sirs I tell you this now. I did not find a stick upon a sodden periodical, possibly a newspaper (details above) but found the stick that I found nearby and then moved the found stick to where it is situated in the photograph for the practical reasons laid out above.

Which brings me to my point that I wish to have clarification upon. Are there any rules to be followed when it comes to submitting a picture to Found A Stick?

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Well Jamie there are absolutely no hard and fast rules pertaining to pictures of found sticks submitted to us here at Found A Stick. There are however some hard and fast rules pertaining to pictures submitted to us here at Found A Stick and they are as follows:

1. It must be a found stick.

2. It must be made of wood.

So Jamie we hope that has brought the clarification to your uninteresting point as you wished. A big thank you for sharing your found stick with us and a much smaller thank you for sharing your un-understandable concerns with us all at such wonderfully unwarranted great length. Your words were the source of literally seconds of non verbal, shrug driven debate here at Found A Stick and for that we are most appreciative.